Felidae's Xanga

Thursday, October 11, 2007

Thu, 11 Oct 2007 21:40:04 GMT

So its my first post for a long time, and DO I have a good reason!

Finally after four months of living in New York, dealing with roaches and mice, summer without ac, my first visual experience of a death, the relationship with my gwailo,being homeless and peniless, people talking trash about a psychology major, ignorance, people telling me how i have no home and culture, return of my asthma, moving into a new home, new relationships ... I finally found the job that fits my insane criteria. (insane criteria being exposure to cultural psych, exposure to psych's in the field, decent pay, and working with ppl)

and now im frightened.

The job itself is great, I get to work with families of different cultures- learning about cultural psych right there, I get to work with psychologists, concelors, therapists- thats my psychology experience there as well, and most importantly, I get to be of service to other people, to be able to make a difference in this dog eat dog world.

If I can do a job then this is a mental "fuck you" to every banker out there. not all of them ofcourse, but to the ones who are just there to get rick quick and dirty, the ones who make so much yet are too stingy to share with anyone, the ones who can only think as far as their noses and only care about themselves. The ones who think that its okay to want everything for myself and be selfish regardless of what I do. Who cares if other people get hurt in my way. I've dealt with more than enough of the personality types and sometimes it makes me physically sick to think about it. The sick bastards who are bankers but want to go out with a social worker, a teacher, a nurse, so they can shake off some of the guilt.

but back to the main point. fear of entering the real world. bankers play with peoples money, lots and lots of it, so they are stressed out and unable to fuckup. I'll be working with peoples lives, children, during the age where 85% of brain development occurs... if I fuck up, its someones life I've changed forever. money can be earned again, but you only have one life. And who am I to say whats right. No wonder they pay a decent wage. So a lot of it should be common sense, and the rest im hoping comes from the good training im shall soon get. I want to ask if I have it in me to do something like this, but the simple answer is yes. Except that I dont just want to do the job right. I want to do it well.

I asked for advice about going into the field and this is what i've been given so far:

1. Dont let it get personal. The minute you let it get into your heart, let it come home with you then it will become too much. I suppose this prevention for burning out. If im dealing with 40 cases at a time....Im guessing that im gonna have to learn a little self restriction. But better that than not having a heart at all huh.

2. You have to keep yourself healthy and have something in you, if you must be able to offer part of yourself to others. Dont be working till late hours, because the next day and the next your just going to pay for that. Eat healthy, sleep, rest, relax with a balanced diet of everything. only then can you be nourished enough to offer yourself to others.

3. Friends are important, keep those who can listen and counsel you as well. Worst are the ones who only give negative feedback, the ones who just want you there so YOU can be there for them, without a care of how you feel. The ones who will not make way for you in their lives, and only do what is convenient for them. Gotta becareful you dont become one of those friends too. A relationship is give and take, compromise, if you truly believe it, you can change small things in you, if they are truly worth it. If people never changed.. we would all still be cavemen ripping raw meat off the still-beating heart of a new born lamb.

Work doesnt start till a little later, but im excited and glad to be doing something important to me, even thou it is a little scary. I hope this advice can be shared and of use to others as well.

lots of love,

Shirls

Friday, August 17, 2007

Fri, 17 Aug 2007 03:28:32 GMT

this site isnt dead. or I dont intend to let it die, despite the small amount of visitors who come. been busy with some sort of a life living it up in NYC. And havent really had time to sit down and think. gimme some time, I promise that I'll be back. I've wanted to write about a lot of things, thoughts that have flittered through my mind but just havent been able to get a proper time to sit down. Hopefully the next post you will see will be something worthy of your time.

Friday, March 16, 2007

Fri, 16 Mar 2007 15:32:22 GMT

Taken from http://www.fda.gov/fdac/features/1998/498_dep.html just some basic data below on depression that EVERYONE should know. And should be ashamed of nto knowing earlier about.

    People think that depression is just something that people need to wake up from, that they can simply shrug it off and its their fault that they are depressed. Well thats simply not true and telling people that they have to deal with it is not always the right solution because depression can be a serious illness. If someone has the flu or breaks a leg you dont ask them to snap out of it, or blame them for it, they have to take medicine or go through therapy to get better again. Depression is just the same, except that its on the inside. Pain isnt just a physical thing, people have shown that even mental pain can lead to the release of the same chemicals that are released from mental pain. Just because you cant see it doesnt mean it doesnt exist.

    So the next time you get tired of your friend or frustrated that she cant do anything about it, the next time you tell them that its up to them to deal with it think again, because maybe they cant and they do need help from the outside. And if you do care maybe you can really do something about if if your a friend. (scroll to bottom for advice on what to do).

    And for the loosers out there who arnt depressed but think they are because they had a bad day.. suck it up! haha.. okay sorry im kidding, but as a psych major i have had a lot of people ask me about depression, people who ask about symtoms, think they have it, think their friends have it... If people are interested i can put up a list of symptoms that the medical profession use as a checklist, but there are so many variables and its hard to draw a line. But depression is not to be taken lightly of.

Main point is, depression isnt just a mood that people get into, and its not their fault they are depressed. So give me some of your time and read the following, and you can be a true friend if need be it.

    you are not alone.

Dealing with the Depths of Depression

by Liora Nordenberg

"I am now the most miserable man living. If what I feel were equally distributed to the whole human family, there would be not one cheerful face on earth. Whether I shall ever be better, I cannot tell. I awfully forebode I shall not. To remain as I am is impossible. I must die or be better it appears to me."
--Abraham Lincoln

Imagine attending a party with these prominent guests: Abraham Lincoln, Theodore Roosevelt, Robert Schumann, Ludwig von Beethoven, Edgar Allen Poe, Mark Twain, Vincent van Gogh, and Georgia O'Keefe. Maybe Schumann and Beethoven are at the dinner table intently discussing the crescendos in their most recent scores, while Twain sits on a couch telling Poe about the plot of his latest novel. O'Keefe and Van Gogh may be talking about their art, while Roosevelt and Lincoln discuss political endeavors.

But in fact, these historical figures also had a much more personal common experience: Each of them battled the debilitating illness of depression.

It is common for people to speak of how "depressed" they are. However, the occasional sadness everyone feels due to life's disappointments is very different from the serious illness caused by a brain disorder. Depression profoundly impairs the ability to function in everyday situations by affecting moods, thoughts, behaviors, and physical well-being.

Twenty-seven-year-old Anne (not her real name) has suffered from depression for more than 10 years. "For me it's feelings of worthlessness," she explains. "Feeling like I haven't accomplished the things that I want to or feel I should have and yet I don't have the energy to do them. It's feeling disconnected from people in my life, even friends and family who care about me. It's not wanting to get out of bed some mornings and losing hope that life will ever get better."

Depression strikes about 17 million American adults each year--more than cancer, AIDS, or coronary heart disease--according to the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH). An estimated 15 percent of chronic depression cases end in suicide. Women are twice as likely as men to be affected.

Many people simply don't know what depression is. "A lot of people still believe that depression is a character flaw or caused by bad parenting," says Mary Rappaport, a spokeswoman for the National Alliance for the Mentally Ill. She explains that depression cannot be overcome by willpower, but requires medical attention.

Fortunately, depression is treatable, says Thomas Laughren, M.D., team leader for psychiatric drug products in FDA's division of neuropharmacological drug products.

In the past 13 years, the Food and Drug Administration has approved several new antidepressants, including Wellbutrin (bupropion), Prozac (fluoxetine), Zoloft (sertraline), Paxil (paroxetine), Effexor (venlafaxine), Serzone (nefazodone), and Remeron (mirtazapine).

According to the American Psychiatric Association (APA), 80 to 90 percent of all cases can be treated effectively. However, two-thirds of the people suffering from depression don't get the help they need, according to NIMH. Many fail to identify their symptoms or attribute them to lack of sleep or a poor diet, the APA says, while others are just too fatigued or ashamed to seek help.

Left untreated, depression can result in years of needless pain for both the depressed person and his or her family. And depression costs the United States an estimated $43 billion a year, due in large part to absenteeism from work, lost productivity, and medical costs, according to the National Depressive and Manic Depressive Association.

Three Types

The three main categories of depression are major depression, dysthymia, and bipolar depression (sometimes referred to as manic depression).

Major depression affects 15 percent of Americans at one point during their lives, according to the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. Its effects can be so intense that things like eating, sleeping, or just getting out of bed become almost impossible.

Major depression "tends to be a chronic, recurring illness," Laughren explains. Although an individual episode may be treatable, "the majority of people who meet criteria for major depression end up having additional episodes in their lifetime."

Unlike major depression, dysthymia doesn't strike in episodes, but is instead characterized by milder, persistent symptoms that may last for years. Although it usually doesn't interfere with everyday tasks, victims rarely feel like they are functioning at their full capacity. According to the National Alliance for the Mentally Ill, almost 10 million Americans may experience dysthymia each year.

Finally, bipolar disorder cycles between episodes of major depression and highs known as mania. Bipolar disorder is much less common than the other types, afflicting about 1 percent of the U.S. population. Symptoms of mania include irritability, an abnormally elevated mood with a decreased need for sleep, an exaggerated belief in one's own ability, excessive talking, and impulsive and often dangerous behavior.

Genes and Environment

Study after study suggests biochemical and genetic links to depression. A considerable amount of evidence supports the view that depressed people have imbalances in the brain's neurotransmitters, the chemicals that allow communication between nerve cells. Serotonin and norepinephrine are two neurotransmitters whose low levels are thought to play an especially important role. The fact that women have naturally lower serotonin levels than men may contribute to women's greater tendency to depression.

Family histories show a recurrence of depression from generation to generation. Studies of identical twins confirm that depression and genes are related, finding that if one twin of an identical pair suffers from depression, the other has a 70 percent chance of developing the disease. For fraternal twins or siblings, the rate is just 25 percent.

Environmental factors, however, may also play a role in depression. When combined with a biochemical or genetic predisposition, life stressors (such as relationship problems, financial difficulties, death of a loved one, or medical illness) may cause the disease to manifest itself.

John (not his real name), 25, was diagnosed with depression for the first time last year when he and his girlfriend ended their three-year relationship. "I couldn't do anything because I was totally absorbed with the whole break-up issue," he says. "It was impossible for me to sleep, and I would wake up at 3 or 4 in the morning and literally shake. And when it was time to wake up, I just couldn't get out of bed."

In addition, substance abuse and side effects from prescription medication may also lead to a depressive episode. And research shows that people battling serious medical conditions are especially prone to depression. According to the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, those who have had a heart attack, for example, have a 40 percent chance of being depressed.

Seasonal affective disorder, often called "SAD," is a striking example of an environmental factor playing a major role in depression. SAD usually starts in late fall, with the decrease in daylight hours and ends in spring when the days get longer.

The symptoms of SAD, which include energy loss, increased anxiety, oversleeping, and overeating, may result from a change in the balance of brain chemicals associated with decreased sunlight. The exact reason for the association between light and mood is unknown, but research suggests a connection with the sleep cycle. Several studies have suggested that light therapy, which involves daily exposure to bright fluorescent light, may be an effective treatment for SAD.

Diagnosing the Disease

Medical professionals generally base a diagnosis of depressive disorder on the presence of certain symptoms listed in the American Psychiatric Association's Diagnostic and Statistical Manual. The DSM (presently in the fourth edition) lists the following symptoms for depression:

depressed mood
loss of interest or pleasure in almost all activities
changes in appetite or weight
disturbed sleep
slowed or restless movements
fatigue, loss of energy
feelings of worthlessness or excessive guilt
trouble in thinking, concentrating, or making decisions
recurrent thoughts of death or suicide.

The diagnosis depends on the number, severity and duration of these symptoms.

Even with this list of symptoms, diagnosing depression is not simple. According to the National Alliance for the Mentally Ill, it takes an average of eight years from the onset of depression to get a proper diagnosis.

In making a diagnosis, a health professional should also consider the patient's medical history, the findings of a complete physical exam, and laboratory tests to rule out the possibility of depressive symptoms resulting from another medical problem.

The symptoms of the depressive part of bipolar disorder are the same as those expressed in major (unipolar) depression. Because of the similarities in symptoms and the fact that manic episodes usually don't appear until the mid-20s, some people with bipolar disorder may mistakenly be diagnosed with unipolar depression. This may lead to improper treatment because antidepressants carry the risk of triggering a manic episode. (For information about treating bipolar disorder, see "Evening Out the Ups and Downs of Manic-Depressive Illness" in the June 1996 FDA Consumer.)

Antidepressant Drugs

One major approach for treating depression is the use of antidepressant medications. The older antidepressants include tricyclic antidepressants such as Tofranil (imipramine) and monoamine oxidase inhibitors such as Nardil (phenelzine). Antidepressants approved more recently include the selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors Prozac, Paxil and Zoloft, and the other newer antidepressants Wellbutrin, Effexor, Serzone, and Remeron.

The effects of antidepressants on the brain are not fully understood, but there is substantial evidence that they somehow restore the brain's chemical balance. These medications usually can control depressive symptoms in four to eight weeks, but many patients remain on antidepressants for six months to a year following a major depressive episode to avoid relapse.

Different drugs work for different people, and it is difficult to predict which people will respond to which drug or who will experience side effects. So it may take more than one try to find the appropriate medication.

Since the mid-1950s, tricyclic antidepressants have been the standard against which other antidepressants have been measured. Monoamine oxidase inhibitors were discovered around the same time as tricyclic antidepressants, but were prescribed less because, if mixed with certain foods or medications, the drugs sometimes resulted in a fatal rise in blood pressure.

Laughren describes Prozac as the "first of a new type of more selective antidepressants." The older antidepressants had unpleasant and sometimes dangerous side effects, such as insomnia, weight gain, blurred vision, sexual impairment, heart palpitations, dry mouth, and constipation. Prozac, other selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors, and other recently approved antidepressants have had generally safer side effect profiles.

A recent study funded by NIMH suggested that Prozac may be as effective in treating children and teens as adults, but the drug is not yet approved by FDA for use in this population.

Other types of therapy, such as natural substances extracted from plants, are currently being studied. Although not approved by FDA, some people believe St. John's wort, for example, is extremely helpful in alleviating their depressive symptoms. (See "An Herbal Alternative?")

When people are unresponsive to antidepressant medications or can't take them because of their age or health problems, electroconvulsive therapy (ECT), or "shock therapy," can offer a lifesaving alternative. Like antidepressants, ECT is believed to affect the chemical balance of the brain's neurotransmitters.

Before ECT, the patient is given anesthesia and a muscle relaxant to prevent injury or pain. Then electrodes are placed on the person's head, and a small amount of electricity is applied. This procedure is usually done three times a week until the patient improves. Some patients may experience a temporary loss of short-term memory.

Talking It Out

For severe depressive episodes, medications are often the first step because of the relatively quick relief they can bring to physical symptoms. For the long term, however, psychotherapy may be needed to address certain aspects of the illness that drugs cannot. "Although the biological features of depression may respond better to drugs," Laughren says, "people may need to relearn how to interact with their environment after the biological part of the depression is controlled."

"I wanted to talk things out and get better in that way," John says. "And even after the first couple of times I saw my therapist, I could do a little bit more. Talking with her gave me some reality that how I was feeling wasn't so abnormal, so unusual, or so terrible."

Anne explains, "It's just comforting sometimes to share the little day-to-day happenings in my life with someone who doesn't get to see them first-hand."

Some find support groups to be invaluable in helping them cope with their depression. "It's through talking with others with similar experiences," says Mary Rappaport, "that you can better understand what you're going through."

Changes in lifestyle are also important in the management of depression. Exercise, even in moderate doses, seems to enhance energy and reduce tension. Some research suggests that a rush of the hormone norepinephrine following exercise helps the brain deal with stress that often leads to depression and anxiety. A similar effect may be obtained through meditation, yoga, and certain diets.

A Bright Future

Like many others who have not had to face depression themselves, John's friends lacked knowledge about the disease. "I think the whole thing really affected my relationships with people," he says. "I was pretty much a jerk all of the time. I didn't want to talk to anybody. I just wanted them to leave me alone."

With the growing awareness of the seriousness of the disorder and the biological causes, the understanding and support of family and friends may be easier to come by. "The future looks very bright for individuals who in the past have often had to suffer alone," says Rappaport. "More and more people are coming out, which encourages people to talk about it." Among those who have "come out" recently to publicly discuss their personal bouts with depression are comedian Drew Carey and "60 Minutes" correspondent Mike Wallace.

Experts say that no one, young or old, has to accept feelings of depression as a necessary part of life. The National Depressive and Manic Depressive Association and other organizations offer medical information and referrals. By trying different options for facing their personal challenges, Anne and others have learned what treatments help them most. "All in all," Anne says, "I think my ability to weather the ups and downs of life has gotten better."

Researchers continue to make great strides in understanding and treating depression. For example, scientists are beginning to learn more about the chromosomes where affective disorder genes appear to be located. "While there is a long way to go in coming up with even more effective drugs," Laughren says, "there's much ongoing research and reason for optimism."

Liora Nordenberg is a freelance writer in Harrisburg, Pa.

"An Herbal Alternative?"

St. John the Baptist's birthday is celebrated on June 24. It is also around this time that the pretty yellow flowers of St. John's wort, the plant named in his honor, bloom in Germany. The plant may be more than just beautiful. Hypericum, the concentrated extract of flowers and leaves, is thought by some to be effective in treating depression.

While the herb is the most-prescribed antidepressant in Germany, in the United States, St. John's wort is not an approved drug. Many health food stores in this country sell it as a dietary supplement, but FDA does not allow any antidepressant claims because it has not been proven to be a safe and effective drug for this use. "There's no particular reason to doubt that it might have biological effects," says Thomas Laughren, M.D., in FDA's division of neuropharmacological drug products. "Whether or not it is an effective antidepressant remains to be seen."

The National Institutes of Health is sponsoring studies to determine if St. John's wort is safe and effective as a treatment for mild to moderate cases of depression. One issue of concern is how the herb interacts with certain drugs, especially antidepressants that affect the brain chemical serotonin.

--L.N.

'If Someone You Know Is Depressed'

According to the National Institute of Mental Health, to help someone recover from depression:

Encourage the person to make an appointment with a doctor, or make the appointment yourself. You may want to go along for support.
Encourage the person to stick with the treatment plan, including taking prescribed medicine. Improvement may take several weeks. If no improvement occurs, encourage the person to seek a different treatment rather than giving up.
Give emotional support by listening carefully and offering hope.
Invite the person to join you in activities that you know he or she used to enjoy, but keep in mind that expecting too much too soon can lead to feelings of failure.
Do not accuse the person of faking illness or expect them to "snap out of it."
Take comments about suicide seriously, and seek professional advice.

Where to Go for Help

Depression Awareness, Recognition, and Treatment (D/ART) Program
National Institute of Mental Health
5600 Fishers Lane
Room 10-85
Rockville, MD 20857
1-800-421-4211
www.nimh.nih.gov

National Depressive and Manic Depressive Association
730 N. Franklin St.
Suite 501
Chicago, IL 60610
1-800-82-NDMDA
www.ndmda.org

National Alliance for the Mentally Ill
200 N. Glebe Road
Suite 1015
Arlington, VA 22203-3754
1-800-950-NAMI
www.nami.org

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Tue, 23 Jan 2007 04:22:54 GMT

http://www.petitiononline.com/killer75/petition.html

egh.pls sign already.

Thursday, December 14, 2006

Thu, 14 Dec 2006 19:20:53 GMT

yay~~ Happy Birthday to me!! This year, well okay this semester has been fruitful and great. Finished my first draft of my thesis as planned this morning pulling an all nighter and am so happy. it is something I think i can be proud of. Now i just need to change all my grammer mistakes for tmr.. bleh, tempted to just get someone to fix them all for me. Thanks for all the wishes and calling on the dot shaz, truly happy to have you all as friends.

~xoxo~

ouch.. got bit on the ass by karma. and i thought I wasnt being that bad a girl this semester. >.<.

Thursday, December 07, 2006

Thu, 07 Dec 2006 05:59:19 GMT

not a poem...

Its that time of year again...
once snazzy lights, festive music, and crazy shopping..
now sleeplessnights, thesis deadlines, and paper topics.

You've been working hard i know
and i know your tired,
thinking that it's all going to be over in a matter of time.

till then you'll go on working,
till then you'll forgo the sleep, the eat, the friends, the works.
till then you have the right to answer with that mediocre grunt
when people ask you how things are

surely you will look back on this and cherish
those days when your so tired but cant stop working
that feeling when your finally done and pass out on the bed
that empty feeling when your suddenly lost without any work

people live up to about 80+ on average i would say.
so now its at least a quarter of your life spent studying.
preparation for the real world supposedly
or you can go on studying as well.

at least for now your not thinking about those lesser problems
that your still single and alone
that you have no idea what your going to do with your life
that you wish you werent such a cow at times

till then go on burning that midnight oil
endulge in caffeine through doubleshots of tea, coffee, and green tea powder
and be content knowing that were all going through the same thing.

*passes out on bed on account of not having slept much in the last few days*
**will not be held liable for anything written in semicomatose state ie the above, that 10 pg paper, and thesis.**
*** been bullet pointing so much these days that i think that even thought patterns come in bullet points***
****Think that im really just trying to say that things are going okay and I miss you all****

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Tue, 05 Dec 2006 09:25:50 GMT

If anyone reads this and will be up at 8:45 .. uh my time (us/canada ... ??!!) please give me a wake up call then. Im this desperate to making sure i wake up. highly doubtful though huh. yawn. so little time, so much to do,

edit:

nvm, made it to class on time!

Sunday, December 03, 2006

Sun, 03 Dec 2006 08:11:04 GMT

The number of legs on 11 lions and one rhino.
The number of vowels in the word “kinetic”.
The number of wheels on two taxis and a bicycle.
99 minus 19, multiplied by three.
Add the numbers.

The answer is 8,327. enjoy!!

Sunday, November 05, 2006

Sun, 05 Nov 2006 01:18:54 GMT

psych.. had an exam today, one monday, and one weds. Ive not been in REM sleep for the past week, just stages one to 4.. and all i can think about is psych..raaghh! I think that even I will be sick of psych after this. anyways, everyone should go make your own pet dragon! its psych.. sensation and perception!!

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Wed, 01 Nov 2006 05:26:18 GMT

studying psych ..studystudystudypsychpsychpsych

Self perception theory: infer attitudes based on observation of behavior. ie..she has a lot of cat posters so she must like cats. hehe.
evidence: overjustification effect: if a child that previously enjoyed washing dishes got paid for it, may not like it as much as mistakenly attribute enjoyment to liking money. obviously doesnt work all the time. but its a basic theory. most dont.

Consistency theory: to maintain behavioural consistency one may change attitudes to maintain consistency.

Reciprocity hypothesis: for attraction, its a 2 way street. We dont merely evaluate a persons quality and ability to judge attractiveness. We also base it on their evaluation of us. (shouldnt happen but it does!)

Belief in Just World (BJW): Tendency to believe that good things only happen to good people, and bad things only happen to bad people, therefore will blame the victim as individual denies the possibility of innocent victims. Hard to believe this is a psych theory but it is copied straight from the book.

Prisoners Dilemma: 2 prisoners A and B in jail interogated separately. told that if neither confess then they wil get a minor punishment. If A confesses and B doesnt, A gets away free and B will get maximum punishment. vice versa if B confesses and A doesnt... and if they both confess they will get a medium length punishment. A study to look at cooperation.

random thought of the day: thinking about recieving gifts, ive discovered that sometimes the most unexpected ones are the ones that touch me the most. Ones that indicate i thot of you today with care, no reason why, nothing expected back. even if its just a burnt cd, these are the ones that I will never forget.